In which I seek professional help

I accidentally saw part of the Outback Bowl earlier today. One of the TV talking heads held a mirror up to the South Carolina living gamecock mascot to show it going nuts trying to peck the "other chicken" it saw. I creeped out, until I realized nothing would be more satisfying at that point in the game than to see Cocky, South Carolina's foam-head mascot, wander over to the other sideline and peck that other chicken Herky to death.

Real animals fighting to the death for human amusement? Disgusting. Giant foam chickens? Hell yeah.

(13 years ago I got to the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans. During the game, the Virginia Tech Hokie Bird went after Texas' silly live cow with a knife and fork. Now THAT is quality mascot-ing.)