Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Obama Voters

Two anecdotes from my day, illustrating (along with the stuff I posted at Badger Blogger) why I will spending most of the next four years drunk as a form of self-preservation.

1) At the office after lunch, five O-bots were giving each other high-fives, and then they realized none of them knew who the governor of WI was. Not a single fucking one of them. The Palin-bashing vegan knew her Congressional representative was "Gwen Something...something long and complicated" (that would be Moore...I can see how such a foreign-sounding a name with so many syllables can be hard to remember), and one of them thought there was a Sentienthauser involved somewhere (Sensenbrenner, who doesn't represent any of them). They never got around to wondering who their Senators were.

Oh yeah, you're enlightened, superior beings, smarter and better than me. I'm so glad your ilk are running the country. Assholes.

2) At the gym, two women (I think they were women...I don't like to belittle fat people because I look like Jabba the Hutt from the neck down, but these creatures outweighed me at least 100 pounds apiece, maybe even 150, and it was kind of hard to tell what biological sex they were since they had crew cuts, but I was in the women's locker room so that's as good an assumption as any) swooning--NAKED--over the TV, which was showing the coronation. And then, they talked:

Being 1: Oh my God! It's so awesome!
Being 2: Like, this guy at school said they should just cut spending. And I was like, duh! Rich people should pay for it!
Being 1: People are so suh-STOO-pid! [Yes. She made it three syllables, which is worth a bitch-slap right there.] You can't fix anything without spending! I mean, you can't cut anything! You have to spend!
Being 2: I know! Thank God Obama's smarter than that!

There was probably more, but the whole world turned misty red and I put on my boots without putting on pants so I could get the fuck out of there without screaming "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW FUCKING IGNORANT YOU ARE?!" because it's generally a bad idea to get in a fight with 600 pounds of deadweight even if you haven't overworked your arms out of sheer adrenalinic pissed-offed-ness. All they would have had to do to incapacitate me was fall on me...

I should have asked them if they had any fucking idea what sort of spending Obama would be rubber-stamping, because I'm sure they couldn't name anything more specific than "health care for poor babies!" (without mentioning it would only be for the babies that weren't murdered on the taxpayers' dime) but it wasn't until after I was halfway home that I remembered "$350 million for fucking appliances."

I woke up today ready to give Obama and his supporters the benefit of the doubt, and they were all assholes (I won't even mention the whitey-bashing, because I can't do it in a half-way civilized manner) and imbeciles. The hell with them all.


Steve Burri said...

Have a nice day? I walk in nearly sequestered conservative circles, so I must come over here to experience such day-to-day stupidity. My condolences.

Sabra said...

Oh, H-R, thank you sooo much for a hearty laugh! "...and I put on my boots without putting on pants..." [still chuckling at that]

Yes, these "enlightened, superior beings, smarter..." are the ilk that are running the country AND ruining the country. You'd never be able to convince them of that, though. They can see no wrong with what's going on.

I'm taking an Arabic class. Last night a large [I'm being polite] woman said, "I have to leave early. It's the inauguration." Like it should have been a holiday, or something. The instructor said, "okay." Then a few more said, "I'd like to leave too." Leave then. But don't expect the instructor to waste time next week going over what YOU missed because you CHOSE to leave early when I am paying for this class to learn something that I learned last night and don't need to have repeated. You could tell from the class who voted for "teh one." Okay. Done ranting. And my rant was NO WHERE near as good as yours was!

HeatherRadish said...

Oh, yeah, the whole office stopped so people could watch the--mysteriously not blocked, even though "streaming video" violates the IT policy and is blocked by Websense on any normal day--thing live, and then they spent the whole f-ing afternoon talking about it. And talking to me about it, like this is supposed to be a highlight of my life or something. (Well, the 20-something white hipsters did; the black guy who drives the security van talked about the Brewers. Go fig.)

I probably should have gone directly home, but dammit, I like lifting weights.

Neocon Blonde said...

Oh I so needed this today! LOL

After I called Obama's speech platitude filled sandwich, somebody actually told me, "Perhaps we need the "platitudes" [yes she used the quote fingers]" then she told me to consider the audience, circumstances, and the message.

Uh, what message? Platitude sandwich equals no message.

Shoebox said...

Athletic clubs are interesting places politically. The one I attend has the audio for the FOX news station broadcast on a frequency that interrupts the radio station that has Rush et al...They don't have that same line up at a different location. When I ask that they change it, they use some "technical issue" reason....I think it's a conspiracy!

Thanks for the good laugh...it was the only thing I was able to laugh about watching yesterday's nonsense.