I read this "Help, Sarah Palin is ruining my life!" bit on Salon yesterday, and just stared at it open-mouthed. The "advice" is worse than the letter--smug, condescending, nothing new. But Sweet Michelle Obama's boxing gloves!! How pathetic do you have to be to let someone who doesn't even know you "ruin your life" by being alive and successful??

Kat-Mo at Ace had the best response ever.

I'm pretty sure even The O Himself can't ruin my life just by existing. And he like, controls the oceans and stuff. Yeah, he's going to hope and change America into oblivion and his policies will make my life harder and more painful, but the "ruining" part, I already did that. :P

(I will confess to harboring dark thoughts about smashing the TV in the locker room at the gym this evening when I was changing and O's ignorant 2-minute economics commercial--the one where he promises to Raise Taxes On Businesses and simultaneously Create Millions Of Jobs--came on. I don't need to see O's stupid ears on a big screen while I'm half-naked. What is this, Club Gitmo? But I've had the same thoughts about being subjected to The Biggest Loser, Larry King, and the Cubs. There are just some places you don't need a TV...and if you can't handle being ten minutes without TV, you have bigger problems than I do.)

Election fraud

It's a start, I suppose.

A Milwaukee resident was charged Monday with election fraud, the first charge in an investigation into voter registration workers who submitted fake names to the city in what a complaint says amounted to a quota system.

Well and good, and I don't feel sorry for her, but what about the people who instituted this "quota system" and the people funding "the Community Voters Project"? They're just going to hire more mules to keep signing up fictional/ineligible voters.

WTF!

Brewers play 2 p.m. Wednesday. I have to work ('cause I'm all brainwashed by consumerism--remember, no woman actually works to put a roof over her own head! *mutter*). And the IT dept blocked the play-by-play feed in August.

Thursday looks better; Brewers at 5 and VP debate at 8.



Is it just me, or does it look like Wash U scheduled Bob Uecker's stunt double to fill in for Joe Biden?

AHA!

Finally, a use for that Buffalo Bills fabric I found in my closet. I think it's worth a couple grand...

Election season...

This would bother me if Pennsylvania wasn't up for grabs.

*

The AP seems confused

(What else is new?)

New York Mets' Oiliver Perez throws against the Milwaukee Brewers in the first inning of a baseball game at Shea Stadium on Sunday, Sept. 28, 2008


Milwaukee Brewers' Scott Olsen throws against the New York Mets in the first inning of baseball play at Shea Stadium on Sunday, Sept. 28, 2008

The second one is especially entertaining, as Scott Olsen's shirt very clearly says "Marlins."

Can I stop paying my student loans?

It's the only debt I have, and it would make a nice downpayment on a house. Unfortunately, I owe the Dept. of Education and not a foreign bank.

Reminder that the bailout allows foreign banks to partake of American taxpayer funding — and that the bailout plan includes buying student loans, car loans, credit card debt and any other “troubled” assets held by banks.

I'm troubled that there's "agreement" and yet no one knows if the provision granting billions of dollars to ACORN is still in it.

Quilting in the "recession"

(Quotes, as we haven't had one quarter of negative growth lately, much less the two consecutive quarters necessary to be in a recession, although God only knows what will happen after January 20...).

The most interesting part of this article on quilter spending in a shaky economy is the admission from a former business writer that journalists crave disaster.

I've noticed some interesting trends among the "dedicated quilters" on a list a read. First, they worried about the price of everything, including all the sacrifices they were making to continue to buy quilting supplies and classes (but not the price of gas, because oil is bad for Mother Gaia), which seems consistent with the article. Then the same people had a thread on why they make art for little to no money instead of working for wages (women who work for wages are chasing false idols of consumerism--that was news to me). Then I look at their blogs and they're all supporting Obama because they want "free" health care and think working people have too much money. With no sense of realization that their lifestyles are possible because their husbands are/were working for wages so their wives could afford all those week-long classes...

(I almost unsubscribed after a thread bitching about the TSA searching their sewing bags that didn't place a shred of blame on people who hijack airplanes. There's morons and power-drunk assholes at every TSA checkpoint, but I can't forget why they got that power in the first place.)

Anyway, I don't see contemporary young women taking to stitching together scraps in the evenings for cheap entertainment like they did in the 1930s; there are too many electronic entertainments available (not to mention the sexual revolution provided new acceptable ways for young women to while away an evening for no cash down). The AARP crowd, possibly. Hard to say. There was a resurgence of "traditional crafts" in the 1970s, but I think it was spurred by the bicenntenial more than Carter's economy...

Wow!

Yesterday I asked who would be keeping law enforcement from arresting those who criticize The One. The answer, via Peter, is: Governor Matt Blunt.

Read the whole press release; it's amazing, in a "I can't believe he said that" way. Then again, I can't believe it needed to be said in the first place...

Bork bork bork

I didn't draw this, but it's funny anyway.

And this, it's like they're peering in my window.

I didn't watch the debate, either.

Americans Revealed To Have Lives on Friday Nights

And I'm guessing the people who *did* watch have already decided and were just waiting to see how bad the other guy screwed up.

I figured footage and transcripts (with Obama's annoying uh um uh cleaned up) would all be online by morning, making the Brewers a better use of my time. Plus, it's not like the guy I'm not voting for was going to say anything that would make me change my mind. Especially this.

Did someone say "climate change"?

Yeah, I know you have to be some sort of illiterate drooling snaggletoothed hick to think the sun has any effect on the temperature of the Earth...

Our Sun has shown few active regions -- that house even fewer associated sunspots -- for over a year now, and such a period of relative calm is quite unusual. What is well known is that our Sun is in a transitional period between solar cycles called a Solar Minimum, where solar activity has historically been reduced. The stark lack of surface tumult is unusual even during a Solar Minimum, however, and activity this low has not been seen for many decades.

How can the terrestrial science be "settled" when the solar science isn't?

Many solar photos.

Elections around the world...

Before you start wishing Sarah Palin would show up in a dirndl, thank all the gods we don't have to see Joe Biden or John McCain in leather shorts. *shudder*

To make matters worse, the wife of Bavarian governor Günther Beckstein, Marga Beckstein, refused to wear any kind of Dirndl to the opening day of this year's Oktoberfest, breaking a long-held tradition for Bavarian First Ladies.

Her move may be understandable given that she hails from the Bavarian city of Nuremberg where the women don't traditionally wear Dirndls. But it has proved so controversial in Munich circles that it is being referred to as "Dirndl Gate" and could cost her husband much-needed votes in the Bavarian regional election on September 28.

I didn't even like having to see the photos of Obama rising from the surf like a scrawny Venus. But please--someone dress him up in blaze orange. That's the best part of the whole election season, the Dem nominee pretending to be familiar with masculinity, and that they're part of a culture they despise.

(Which reminds me, I have find my orange hat and look up which state parks are having a deer harvest this year...I just don't want my big butt being mistaken for venison.)

Scratch a liberal, find a totalitarian

Literally.

Start with "politics Vladimir Putin style" (I hope the McCain-Palin Secret Service detail carry alpha particle detectors). The Obama campaign is threatening the FCC licenses of TV stations who carry an NRA anti-O ad, which you can see at the Instapundit link. And which, in my opinion, would have been stronger if it had included the quote of him saying he won't take your guns away because he doesn't have the votes in Congress. Not because that would be unConstitutional, or because you have a right to kill deer other than with your car, but because he doesn't have enough sensitive tolerant keep-everyone-dependent-on-government types in Congress. Yet. *boggle*

(Was it Ann Coulter who said liberals get upset when you quote them accurately?)

And in Missouri, city and county attorneys and "law enforcement" are standing by to file criminal libel charges against those who blaspheme The One. Now, I understand the need for libel/slander laws, but "false criticisms" of Barack Obama means "anything he doesn't want you to know" and has little to do with facts in public evidence. (Just the threat may itself be illegal under the KKK Act--delicious irony--but who's going to enforce it against "law enforcement"?)

This is seriously disturbing.

I thought we'd at least get to the victory party before the hopey-changey-lovey mask was ripped away and voters were allowed to see what lurks beneath. Threatening the electorate with arrest and shutting down their local purveyor of Dancing With the Stars shouldn't win votes. Then again, maybe it doesn't matter what voters think.

I'm partial to Ritz...

Billy Jeff's going to, as he says, "hustle up the cracker vote."

1) If he's this funny now, wait until he's lived as long as Jimmeh Carteh!
2) I love how much he hates Barack Obama.

Roger L. Simon thinks Clinton wants McCain to win for the good of the country, but that seems inconsistent with the past 16 years.

Hell yeah.

I can bore all my nephews and all their children for the next forty years with the story of being there for Ryan Braun's first major league grand slam. WOO-HOO! "I was right behind home plate*, and seven innings after I was almost killed by a foul ball that left a dent in the wall by the press box..."**

I wonder if I could get a poster of that photo. Or this one.

*On the second level, but who puts that sort of detail in a story for children about the olden times?
**It hit a couple of feet over my head as I was coming back with a snack. Maybe God's trying to tell me to lay off the bratwurst...

I spent 8 innings mentally planning a snarky "what recession?" post bitching about the two couples next to me who spent 9 innings talking about their children and their remodeling and not only not paying a whit of attention to the game--who drops $100/couple to have a conversation you could have at any Starbucks for under $10? Is this one of those "married people things" I'm not allowed to understand??--but being audibly annoyed at people clapping, cheering, and going for beer (also, ladies, if you don't want to get beer on your toes, don't wear flip-flops to the baseball game). But this is a lot better.

Subprime, indeed.

Two Lumps.

Alright.

I'm going to go watch Yovani Gallardo (wow!) pitch tonight, before the Götterdämmerung kicks off this weekend. Nice of 'em to schedule it for the Colts' bye week. *mutter*

Tea with Il Nano

I have no idea why I found this so funny.

A: I'm really saying I want all unbelievers to burn! Why are you trying to read something bad into it?

This can't be good for America.

Eeew.

Aaaargh.

I can't !*$&# believe I didn't start !*$&# Fred Taylor on my !*$&# fantasy team. He's going to be more points this week than the rest of the non-Colts games put together.

(I am starting Jessica Simpson. GB 56, Dallas 42, 6 passing TDs, everyone's happy.)

Update: Yeah, well, yeah, !*$&#. Oooh, shoes!

Saturday! Saturday! Saturday! Saturday...

Last spring I said, "This summer I will explore Wisconsin!" Then the price of gasoline--well, we've all been bitch-slapped by the Invisible Hand, no need to dwell on it. (Drill, baby, drill!)

So today I finally took off driving. After being pulled off the interstate by the siren song of "Quilts n Silks", where I engaged in a mutually beneficial transaction motivated by selfishness, greed, and cute cat fabric *hee hee*, I realized that despite all the times I've been to the quilt shop in Manitowoc, I've never been to the Wisconsin Maritime Museum across the street.

There weren't quite enough exhibits to keep me occupied while I waited for two groups of seasoned citizens on bus trips to go through the submarine before my tour was called (admittedly, I skipped the "children's activity" sections), but they sell cold root beer called "Torpedo Juice" and I carry a notebook for just these situations. The exhibits concentrated on the people involved in ship-building and fishing; could have gone further into details of how ships were made *nerd*. I also enjoyed "controlling the steam engine", although it was hard to miss the hydraulics that were moving the pistons in lieu of steam. And the models--like the antique cars, I had almost no idea what I was looking at, but I could appreciate the time and skill that went into crafting them.

The tour of the USS COBIA was excellent, and I recommend it for all short people interested in military history. Our tour guide was a retired Marine drill sargeant (I don't think "Listen up, people!" was in the original script :) and quite funny. Relayed lots of stories told to him by men who had been stations on submarines. Tour lasted about an hour, and by the end I was anxious to get topside and breathe some fresh air. I am in awe of everyone who served in "The Silent Service."


Afterwards, I noticed a lighthouse. Bit of a hike around the marina, but a nice, cool breeze. Nice day to be out--dogs, nuns, teenagers sucking face, old biker-looking dudes catching huge fish just feet from the shore. While I was out on the breakwater, there was a freighter! And it went into the harbor!

("So what?" you say. The biggest body of water near my hometown is a 98.5-acre fake lake stocked with crappies. Anything larger than a canoe fascinates me.)

The Michipicoten! I love the Internet! She's Canadian, no doubt delivering poutine or back bacon or liquored-up kickers.

And as usual, there is a set of pictures on Flickr.

Good grief.

When you get ejected from an NCAA game, you're not allowed to play in the next week's game.

Which saves Gene Chizek the trouble of suspending the moron/asshole who tackled the UNLV running back who scored the first touchdown tonight AFTER he had handed the ball back to the officials. *boggle* Yo, Nebraska is thataway. And it's not like ISU needs hundreds of penalty yards to get humiliated. Our new punter seems good though. *sigh*

Maybe he heard there were New England Patriots scouts in attendance.

(Unrelated, the Brewers sent me e-mail telling me I did not win a chance to purchase post-season tickets. I feel strangely unaffected by this news.)

Heh.

I'm just going to start sending this (the quote AND the link) as a reply to all those stupid "Sarah Palin's an evil c*** who will destroy us all" forwards.

"Halp us, Barak Obammy! We r stuk in fli-over cuntree!"

I'd send information about O deploying his blackshirts to shut down Chicago talk radio when he doesn't like what's being said about him, but no one's going to read that. It contradicts what they already believe in their hearts.

Let's just get this election over with

I'm so tired of seeing this catshit (this is the least offensive example, trust me) everytime I read quilt blogs and friends' personal journals and every other email with "FWD:" in the subject line. Can we just move on to the gloating (and/or race riots) and stop the snide crass self-congratulation-on-how-smarter-we-are-than-people-who-go-to-church? It's like water torture, and I'm only two "Sarah Palin is an evil bitch!" conversations away from going Towanda the Avenger.

Full disclosure: I do laugh any time Gary Varvel draws Obama's ears, but that sort of thing is a) a tradition of political cartooning and b) doesn't co-opt, politicize, and vulgarize any treasured American icon. And half the time I still think McCain looks like Statler and Waldorf's long lost brother. Heh.

(I might start asking them how they think Sarah Palin is going to go about impregnating every American woman after she takes the oath of office. Some of these women I'm convinced there's some Oprah-esque wish-fulfillment fantasy going on here. The liberal ideal of government-as-husband, 35-year-old educated white woman version.)

Semi-related, I attended a birthday dinner last night and at my end of the table conversation centered how how much the Midwest sucks. Too much "sprawl", unlike Portland and Seattle which are awesome because no one's allowed to build so it's pretty and you don't have stupid poor people from the small towns trying to move in (I think I outed myself as an evil baby-polar-bear-starving Neanderthal conversative asshole when I accidentally mentioned out loud that building restrictions are a classic example of how government over-regulation hurts poor people). People from small towns are so..."limited." (guilty) Milwaukee has no progressive culture, just backwards mass-commercial crap (really? There's a one-man play about an East German transvestite going on right now at the Rep....). Lake Michigan is small and boring (!!!). And four distinct seasons? That's for unenlightened boors. You have to be seriously unevolved and classless to like winter.

I LOVE winter. And like the Midwest. And enjoy life in Milwaukee (except for the driving down to the inner city and having to swerve to avoid the people who stand in the middle of the street and stare me down, but I'm thinking you get some of that in the poor parts of any major city, no matter how progressive and cultured it is). Stupid, limit, uncultured, unenlightened, boring, worthless small town hick that I am...I can't help wonder why these people are here instead of someplace more to their liking. I suspect its because it costs a lot of money to live in those places...

I don't think I'll be invited to any more dinners after my friend Andy, who organized it, moves to The Cities next month.

(Two of my favorite writers are Walter E. Williams and Thomas Sowell, can you tell?)

Aaaargh.

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest Derrek Lee's jockstrap.

And all the rest of 'em.

Who says he's out of touch?

Obama has tried to assure donors and voters that he's been schooled by Chicago politics.

I can't believe no one's told him that's actually one of the things that scares people.

Insert whimpering noises here.

Bob Sanders, a consensus selection as the 2007 NFL Defensive Player of the Year and a Pro Bowl safety in 2005 and 2007, will miss an undetermined amount of time with a high-ankle sprain, Colts Head Coach Tony Dungy said Wednesday.

Everything is just all wrong this week.

If anyone needs me, I'll be...crap, what do women who don't watch football do on Sundays? watching the Packers game and really dreading Week 7.

Happy Constitution Day!

I'm not sure how I forgot that this morning.

Or last year.

I'm embarrassed.

COEXIST!

I did a Google image search, and learned that the bumpersticker not only offends the Baha'i faith (they're not Pagans and resent their symbol being used to denote Paganism), they've left out Hinduism altogether. *shakes head* Inclusion and diversity and respect, people!

I was going to point out that "it's not just the C who refuses to tolerate other beliefs, no matter what the bumpersticker crowd wants to be true..."

In America, the "right wing" is often used against the Christians. In India, the "right wing" defines the Hindus oppressing the Christians.

Read it, and the WaPo link, and then feel free to explain to me how Christianity and the Enlightenment are the source of all evil and oppression, unlike those beautiful peaceful religions practiced in the developing world for thousands of years.

(I've got a book on Kali, but I'm afraid I won't be able to sleep if I start reading about ritual human sacrifice. I'm a wuss.)

Obsession

Apparently you do miss stuff when you don't buy the local fishwrap (besides Racing Sausage collectibles).

The last dead-tree issue of National Review had a copy of the Obsession DVD, which has already aired on cable. I admit I haven't watched it yet--sheer laziness--but I think I've read enough LFG links to MEMRI over the past two years to not be surprised.

The one I want to get my hands on is the one the BBC's Channel 4 did where they secretly taped the British imams inciting hatred of the very society paying their room and board...

If anyone else who refuses to spend their hard-earned money on the J-S is curious and wants to borrow the DVD, let me know. It's on my TV next to the four-hour black-and-white German films from Netflix. *sheepish*

Hyperbole Shortage!

Women, minorities, NY Times hardest hit:

It’s the worst financial crisis since World War II — there’s really no hyperbole anymore.

On the plus side, no more hyperbole means no more Obama ads...

Party like it's 1958

Yeah, Atlantic Monthly has some real problems with their freelancers as well as the folks on salary (no, I'm not linking to Andrew Sullivan), but I enjoyed this article on the 1958 NFL championship game.

It's really too bad the broadcast of the game wasn't taped/didn't survive. I'd like to see more of what the game used to be.

Happy FUZZ Day

Today marks four years since the cat moved in/took over.

You know how Rush Limbaugh does that "everything I know about women I learned from my cat" bit? I have learned invaluable lessons from FUZZ that I may be able to apply to men:

• They can be won over with food.
• They love toys.
• If they look like they're listening, don't be surprised if they don't remember anything you're saying.
• If you never let them go outside without a harness and a leash, they can't run off with another woman.
  

I should write a book and get on Oprah.

I was about to give up sports altogether and take up shoe-shopping as a hobby when Anthony Gonzalez busted out a reception-run-lateral to save the day. Phew. I don't have anywhere to wear women's shoes...

It's been a long disappointing weekend.

(So, I've spent the last two years telling anyone who will listen that Tom Brady wasn't the best active QB in the league, let alone the best ever--any reasonably competent QB could fit into Belichick's system and win. Well, look at that...)

Electoral College Map

Michigan and Minnesota are a "toss-up" based on polls of likely voters. MICHIGAN. MINNESOTA.

I was excited for a few seconds, until I remembered you can't poll the dead, the fictional, and the "I don't know nothin' about that stuff, that nice girl from ACORN said she'd take care of that for me."

I got yer audacity of hope right here

Big 10 Network, 11 a.m.





UPDATE, 9/14: It's amazing. People I haven't heard from in six months, people I haven't seen in years, people who forget my birthday, people who are actively avoiding my phone calls because they owe me money--they all suddenly remember my cell phone number when Iowa wins. Bah.

Important lesson not learned after Hurricane Katrina

Build more refineries, including some in parts of the country that don't get hurricanes.

(I don't feel better knowing this lesson was lost on Canada, too.)

Cold shower

Aw, crap.

In the ABC interview, Palin said she believes that "man's activities certainly can be contributing to the issue of global warming, climate change. ... Regardless, though, of the reason for climate change, whether it's entirely, wholly caused by man's activities or is part of the cyclical nature of our planet - the warming and the cooling trends - regardless of that, John McCain and I agree that we gotta do something about it."

a) "Climate change" is cyclical and heliogenic.
b) What the F does she think we're going to "do" about the sun's natural cycles???

You know how interfering with the wildlife in Yellowstone--because "naturalists" thought they knew more than nature--screwed it all up? Imagine turning those arrogant bastards loose on the SUN. *shudder*

(OTOH, shooting them into the sun....)

Random thought.

Europeans want Obama to be POTUS. I'm willing to meet them halfway and send him to Brussels.

"Bernard Pollard jerseys selling like hotcakes"

I hope the Onion doesn't pay their sports writers.

FOXBOROUGH, MA—More than 90 0.09 percent of female football fans were lost for the season on Sunday when New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady suffered a left knee injury that will require extensive treatment.

There, fixed it for 'em.

Now, this, this is how it's done (HT to 18to88, who clearly don't live around here because they estimate Ted Thompson's IQ at 260 this week).

(Bill Simmons going under suicide watch, though, I can believe.)

Speaking of football, I'm six chapters into a 1987 biography of Vince Lombardi--I figure his life hasn't changed much in twenty years--which takes me to 1959 and Packers days. This is my third season living here, it's time to get serious with the working knowledge...

I'll take suggestions for scholarly books about the pre-Favre Packers.

September 11

I don't have anything to add to the volumes out there already. I was in a meeting all morning with other people who didn't know anything was happening instead of watching it all live, which I think allowed me to be a lot more rational than the people (mostly women) I got in fights with all that week--they ranged from "we deserve it because [various bullshit]" to "we're all going to die/starve/etc 'cause this is the end of America". Which irritated me because there were over 290 million of us covering thousands unaffected square miles, and we're smart, we're resilient, we're tough, and we work hard, so dammit, we were going to get through this, just like we've gotten through everything else, and prevail in the end.

Three years ago I might have said, "and now we see I was right" but now I'm not so sure; the main effect of 9/11 seems to be an accelerated rate of appeasement and creeping Sharia law, and a head-in-the-sand refusal to acknowledge what actually happened.

And I've learned to keep my big yap shut, especially around women. No one wants patriotic optimism when they can wallow in despair.

Scheduling notes

Between Palinmania, and the Brewers wasting a Cubs slump, and the Colts self-destructing, and finding a bag of salad in the beer drawer of my refrigerator(?!), I almost forgot that Saturday is a high holiday in the Radish calendar, Iowa State @ Iowa.

Apparently this year the Hawkeyes are going to the no-huddle offense.

The players' probations prohibit them from having contact with other known criminals.

I'll be here all week!

Well. This is interesting.

Got a letter today from the State of Wisconsin claiming they don't have my birthdate on file because I registered to vote--"at the above address"--before 2003 when that information was not required.

While I appreciate a retroactive effort to verify I didn't sign up as a 10-year-old and vote illegally for five years...I registered to vote in 2006. At my polling location. I don't remember if they asked for my date of birth, but it was prominent on the government-issued ID (...an Iowa driver's license) that they asked to see.

And I couldn't possibly have registered to vote here at this address before 2003 because I was living in West Des Moines and, despite a summer of cat-sitting downtown in 1999, had no idea this address even existed.

I like that they're checking databases and whatnot, but if they have bad data for date of registration, what else is bad?

Five kids

I'm increasingly bothered by "Palin can't be VP and raise five kids." Her oldest son is not a kid at home needing to be tucked in every night--he's been in the U.S. Army for a year. He's raised. He's a full-fledged adult. I know it's fashionable for lefties and other bleeding heads to cry that American soldiers are poor frightened children who need to be brought home and covered in bubble wrap, but they're freakin' MEN and WOMEN. This "five kids at home" meme disrespects a lot more people than just working mothers.

I'm sure she'll be thinking about him constantly when he's in Iraq, but other mothers hold down jobs just fine when their sons and daughters are deployed.

I further note that no one told Nancy Pelosi to quit Congress in 2006 when her daughter was pregnant for the first time--they told her to run for Speaker.

Unrelated: I've been trying to wear lipstick, just to see what it's like, but my hair keeps getting caught in it. Then the lipstick goes from my hair to my shirt. Sigh.

More forced childbearing for all...

Ladies and gentlemen, get yourselves sterilized now, before it's too late. Or something.

QUESTION: If Roe v. Wade were overturned and states could once again prohibit abortion, in your view, to what extent should abortion be prohibited in Alaska?

PALIN: Under this hypothetical scenario, it would not be up to the governor to unilaterally ban anything. It would be up to the people of Alaska to discuss and decide how we would like our society to reflect our values.

Oooh, scary woman-hating fascist! *rolls eyes*

I read a whole lot about this yesterday and failed to save links. None of it matches the "OMG! This stupid **** is gonna control me/my sex partners!!" bullshit I keep hearing at lunch and over the cube wall. (I enough self-control to sit still instead of joining in, which is fortunate because I don't have enough tact to remedy their ignorance of the facts in a way that won't get me sent down to HR. :)

Like I've said...the same lying scare tactics were used against George Bush in 2000 and 2004, and nothing happened. He was the president, not just the administration's representative at funerals, and nothing happened.

History doesn't even start the day we're born anymore, it starts last week. Depressing.

Way to go, Cedarburg!

Hrm, I wonder how I missed this in the local media* this weekend when I was trawling for pictures from the event.

CEDARBURG, Wisc. -- Hundreds of angry people in this small town outside Milwaukee taunted reporters and TV crews traveling with Sen. John McCain on Friday, chanting "Be fair!" and pointing fingers at a pack of journalists as they booed loudly.

Then there's this:

McCain leads Democrat Barack Obama by 50%-46% among registered voters, the Republican's biggest advantage since January and a turnaround from the USA TODAY poll taken just before the convention opened in St. Paul. Then, he lagged by 7 percentage points.

Dear talking empty heads on TV: You're assholes. Thanks!

* No, I don't.

Well.

I have always said Kyle Orton should be the starting QB for the Bears...

(The F-Pats fan on my couch says, "At least Peyton survives to play again." Heh.)

All I'm going to say about Tom Brady's knee

He got his shot when Drew Bledsoe got hurt. Funny how these things work out sometimes, isn't it?

Corey Hart

And thank God for Gabe Kapler, because if the Brewers had ended the day with no hits I would have had to burn the new shirt I wore to the game.

Heh.

An acquaintance of mine who works at the U of Texas had a photo of she took of some celebrities on the sideline of a football game published in US Weekly (in the issue with the cover). I offered my congratulations; she's excited and I'm envious because I'd love to have my photos seen by thousands. But in my head, I'm thinking, "US Weekly? I would so not brag about being associated with them."

Misogynist rant

OK, twice in the past two days I've gotten the same chain e-mail about how Sarah Palin is going to force all pre-menopausal women to get pregnant and give birth if she's the Vice-President. I wish I'd kept the chain e-mails I got in 2000 and 2004 about how George Bush was going to force us all to get pregnant and give birth, just so I could send them as a reply. They were wrong then, and they're wrong now, and their totalitarian fantasies are showing...

For the purposes of "can't we all just get along" I'm assuming the e-mailers are just ignorant of how federal legislation is created and passed, and not knowingly lying to whip up FUD (fear, uncertainty, doubt) among women who don't actually know how the federal government works. The more I think about it, the more I believe it's the latter. C'mon; the vice-president's duties are to bang the gavel on the first day of the Senate and to go to funerals the president doesn't feel like going to. No one in Congress is going to introduce any bills to outlaw abortion or contraceptives ever; if they do, they won't pass a massively Dem-majority Congress. The "worst" outcome is the Supreme Court agreeing to hear a challenge to Roe v. Wade and deciding that states should be allowed to make their own laws.

You have to be seriously delusional to believe that equates to "forced child-bearing." No one's going to tie you down and shoot you full of sperm unless you ask nicely (and maybe not even then).

I'm annoyed that women who are educated and "smart" and held up as an ideal are either a) really fucking stupid, and/or b) believe other women are really fucking stupid. They act like women aren't capable of making decisions or controlling their own behaviors. It's a sick irony--to "empower" women, you have to believe women are weak and stupid. I'm getting sick of "sharing a chromosome" with these bitches.

OTOH...vicious slander, gossip, and backstabbing to enforce acceptable groupthink is totally a chick thing. If you don't believe me, try disagreeing with a group of women sometime. ;)

Gratuitous Reagan post

It's been awhile since I've read Ann Coulter, but I liked her this week.

As a right-winger, Palin will appeal to the narrow 59 percent of Americans who voted for another former small-market sportscaster: Ronald Reagan.

My grandpa, who died in 1986, told me about listening to Reagan call baseball games on WHO out of Des Moines (which is where I first heard Rush Limbaugh). And every time Reagan gave a speech on TV, we all had to be quiet because Grandpa would put his tape recorder right up next to the set to record it. :) I don't know what happened to the tapes, if Grandma threw them out or they were sold at the estate sale after she passed; I wish I had them now.

I'm holding off on "the female Reagan" for a few years, just to be sure. Actually, in 20-30 years, I'd rather be calling someone "the male Palin" ;) I'm a chauvinist like that.

Best analogy yet

From a "mrkwong":

McCain is the carrier deck, Palin is the F-18 taxiing up to the catapult. It takes four years to turn the USS McCain into the wind for launch, and that's plenty of time to do a systems check on the VP.

We throw our bag aboard the USS McCain 'cause if the trial lawyers' and enviro-lobbyists' booze-cruise that is the MS Obama puts to sea, it'll throw a prop and drift around in left-hand circles and it might take eight years to beach the thing.

Also, I should start reading Jim Treacher regularly. Cookie made of dreams!

Rethinking this whole "working to support myself thing"

I gotta press buttons and generate paperwork tomorrow instead of going to Cedarburg. Bah.

Good speech tonight. Delivery wasn't great; liked the bits about taxes, fighting for America, and not giving our money to countries that hate us. Realized Congress will refuse to let him do any of those things....

I want Howard Dean and Barack Obama to condemn in no uncertain language the actions of the Code Pinkos last night and tonight. It's unlikely: last night's...woman...is a major Barry O fundraiser. No one tried to rush the DNC stages; the GOP deserves the same minimum courtesy.

I also want a pony and a flying car; probably better odds I'll get 'em.

Heh.

October 2

The only scheduled debate between vice-presidential candidates is October 2. I hope Biden shows up. ;)

You know what has really stuck out the past few days? Urban/suburban folks--especially in the media--like to go on about how they're smart and sophisticated and rural folks are naive mouthbreathers, but the ones making the most noise seem to have lived really sheltered lives. Change-of-life babies, older sisters babysitting (hi Joel!), nieces and nephews going to preschool with their aunts or uncles--there is nothing going on in the Palin family that doesn't happen outside of major metropolitan areas everywhere.

Except maybe the PTA. Does MPSD have a PTA? That's not a joke, really...

Much has been made about the "hypocrisy" of supporting Bristol Palin while "condemning inner city women who bear children out of wedlock." Hey, if 2012 rolls around and Bristol has one or more additional children out of wedlock with one or more different men who are nowhere to be found, I'll be the first to say, "Wow...that's just wrong." I've never condemned anyone who had an accident, only people who don't learn after the first 2-3 accidents, and people who encourage their behavior. And it's not a "racism" thing as the snide comments imply--there are plenty of dumb white women with 3 kids by 4 men.

(And hey, if any boy who wasn't my cousin had given me any attention in high school, I could have been in Bristol's situation. No condemnation here.)

Best comment: Tonight, she showed how to field dress Democrats. Heh, after Fred Thompson made the comment Tuesday about field dressing moose, I got a mental picture of the Obama staff Googling "field dress" to try to understand why moose need women's clothes.

Today's Two Lumps

ACORN strikes again.

Attention "pro-choice feminists"

Got a project for you.

Stop bleating about "hegemony" and "cultural imperialism" and go do something useful on behalf of women other than yourselves.

Mmmmrph.

I'm always impressed by how much feminists hate, despise, and condescend toward women. You'd think by now it wouldn't surprise me; they've never cared about empowering ordinary women, only about forcing a different oppressive structure on them.

(I could do without all the conservatives repeating over and over that you have to have had babies to be a "real" woman but I'm hoping they're not motivated by malice.)

(Goldstein: "I mean, who knew it would be the left who saw sin growing in a young woman’s womb?")

Oh, and I've spent most of the weekend wishing I could eavesdrop on phone conversations between Bobby Jindal and Ray Nagin.